Universal Monsters Online

During the week different people often let me in on some fun ideas they have found. This week Patris offered me info on a new online web browser based game Universal Monsters Online. I've been putting off starting an account on it, but I've finally decided to go ahead and do it.

From what I can see so far on the website it's sort of like League of Legends. But the game requires no download to play, supposedly I can just play it in my web browser. I haven't exactly figured out how to actually get into the "game world" and play though. Apparently that takes a bit more patience than I have. But I did get my account made,which is a good start... I guess.

Below you can read what they provide about the game on the website.

Universal Monsters Online: The new Multiplayer Online Battle Arena game

Welcome to Universal Monsters Online, the free-to-play browser game! Play as your favorite characters from the Universal Monsters films including Frankenstein, Dracula, The Wolf Man and a multitude of other classic Monsters. Be part of the fast paced action-strategy MOBA (Multiplayer Online Battle Arena). UMO combines high-end 3D isometric graphics, cinematic audio and deep gameplay in a setting from the greatest monster films. Defeat your opponents – get the girl!

No Download Required - Free-To-Play Browser Game

Universal Monsters Online is the amazing new free-to-play online browser game that lets you form your team of hideous Monsters and smash the opposition.

Don’t hide from the Monster. Be the Monster 

It looks kinda promising, at least as something to try and goof off with. I just hope people aren't as "serious" in it as they are in some other games I've tried. I'm not a good gamer, I try, but I'm not good at fighting with/against things. That's part of why I like second life so much, I don't have to fight with anyone if I don't want to.

Tia go Boom!

I saw this pose and had the feeling I had to do something with it. As you can see... I've decided to hide behind the barrel and cover my ears in an attempt to hide from the blast.

I even have my Zydrate Gun handy, just in case I decide I need to "feel nothing at all."

I haven't decided if she's the one who set off the bast, or if it was someone else though XD.

It doesn't really matter though, am quite happy with how it turned out.

^_^ BUSTED!

 

If only it was that easy. I LOVE this song!

ooooh....

So... It's October, which means rl me is going to be a bit more comfortable in public. People are less judgmental in October, and there's a lot more freedom for us oddballs that believe it's nice to be an individual rather than a cookie cut out. But not only that It's a good time of year for me to share some of the interesting items I have found online that I'd love to add to my personal collection if I could.

Item number one, up for your perusal is a Mounted baby dragon skeleton. A wonderful curiosity to see, we know of course, it is not a real skeleton, but a mock up. This delightful specimen is available through the Dapper Cadaver website. Unfortunately it is a bit pricey, being marketed at $200 (plus shipping am guessing).

 You can view this item directly online here. They also have a mummified baby dragon available for curiosity seekers.

The next thing I'd like to raise to you for inspection is an Etsy shop called Furries Leather and Fur Shoppe. They have a variety of real specimens available for those looking for something more "realistic". They have everything from bones, to furs, and some amazing animals preserved for viewing in jars. Their specimens are reasonably priced as well.

I know that to some of you this may sound more than a little bit morbid. But I find them to be beautiful to view. Also, on the listings that I have read over and examined, they are very honest and willing to tell you where the specimen was procured.  You're not going to be receiving a randomly located creature that hasn't been treated properly. You're going to be getting something that they have worked on and take pride in making sure is provided with as much information as may be necessary.

The next item I'm going to share is something that reminds me of Little Shop of Horrors, one of my favorite musicals. It's a plant puppet!  XD when I found it on the HorrorDome website I couldn't help but smile. Even their description was cute! (see the block text below)

Just slip your hand into the false rubber glove and control the Plant making it's head move and chew. The false glove gives the illusion of the plant actually sitting on top of your arm.

 At about $80 dollars though, it's a dream. It would be an amazing prop for a gardener costume. Maybe even a Morticia Addams one. But, it's just an example. You can find it here.

And I think that's enough for today. I can share more of my "wish" list later XD. I don't really need these things, I just think they're fascinating and worth sharing.

Cedric

Attachment *not found*

Attachment is something that terrifies me. I suppose you could say that I am a commitment-phoebe. I'm afraid to put a lot of myself into something, because I always end up alone. Granted recently it was partially me who broke down. I'm terrified that I'm breaking down again, and I don't want to break down here.

It's like manning a ship, only there's no wheel or sail to use as guidance. All there is is the mercy of the social environment. It's very frustrating trying to put oneself back together again. People don't always see the way a person is flailing and floundering, struggling to find a hand hold in the turmoil. Instead they often accept the masks a person wears at face value.

It's a rare person that can see past the shell, and realize how much someone else hurts inside. But these people do exist. If you find someone that can see past the walls you hide behind, don't let them go. It's a rare gift to make a friend like that who truly cares about you.

Reality is a cruel place. It's usually the place that programs or personalities and expectations when we go into Second Life. I know that I try to fill a void by paying sl. But... it hasn't worked out that well so far. There's still an empty place inside, even though I try to pretend there isn't. Sometimes it feels bigger than at other times. Sometimes i even think I've managed to get rid of it.

I have realized that the more people I intertwine my existence with, the more erratic the feeling gets. It becomes unpredictable, the highs and lows becoming unbalanced. I wonder if me enjoying the time I spend with my friends is part of it, or if it's the weather... or if it's other factors all together. After all....reality isn't such a great friend of mine atm. oh well.

sorry. ~_~ that's all I care to write about this for now.

Just a slight musing on the return of the Village

Oh it's good to be home again. Now that the Village has re-opened am feeling a bit more comfortable. My focus is slowly returning. I may not be doing anything productive there atm, but I absolutely love the atmosphere. And the people! It's so wonderful seeing so many of the old regulars all back in the same place. It's been so hard without the friendly faces to banter back and forth with.

Lory has been making some interesting changes to the sim as well. But I'm not going to write about them here, this is my personal blog.

I was feeling lost for a little bit there, but... things are ok now...almost. I know the hard times are still coming. But... I hafta hold on. I have friends and family, and responsibilities. I can't give up now. And I won't. I'm tougher than I think I am... at least I hope I am. ~_~

You're a Gem

OOOH look a Dragon!

Look! Was wandering Sl and saw this super cool classic style carousel dragon. It made me smile ^_^

I feel this way sometimes

Frollo:
The world is cruel
The world is wicked
It's I alone whom you can trust in this whole city
I am your only friend
I who keep you, teach you, feed you, dress you
I who look upon you without fear
How can I protect you, boy, unless you
Always stay in here
Away in here
Remember what I taught you, Quasimodo
You are deformed

Quasimodo:
I am deformed

Frollo:
And you are ugly

Quasimodo:
And I am ugly

Frollo:
And these are crimes
For which the world
Shows little pity
You do not comprehend

Quasimodo:
You are my one defender

Frollo:
Out there they'll revile you
As a monster

Quasimodo:
I am a monster

Frollo:
Out there they will hate
And scorn and jeer

Quasimodo:
Only a monster

Frollo:
Why invite their calumny
And consternation?
Stay in here
Be faithful to me

Quasimodo:
I'm faithful

Frollo:
Grateful to me

Quasimodo:
I'm grateful

Frollo:
Do as I say
Obey
And stay
In here

Quasimodo:
I'll stay
In here

Quasimodo:
Safe behind these windows and these parapets of stone
Gazing at the people down below me
All my life I watch them as I hide up here alone
Hungry for the histories they show me
All my life I memorize their faces
Knowing them as they will never know me
All my life I wonder how it feels to pass a day
Not above them
But part of them

And out there
Living in the sun
Give me one day out there
All I ask is one
To hold forever

Out there
Where they all live unaware
What I'd give
What I'd dare
Just to live one day out there

Out there among the millers and the weavers and their wives
Through the roofs and gables I can see them
Ev'ry day they shout and scold and go about their lives
Heedless of the gift it is to be them
If I was in their skin
I'd treasure ev'ry instant

Out there
Strolling by the Seine
Taste a morning out there
Like ordinary men
Who freely walk about there
Just one day and then
I swear I'll be content
With my share
Won't resent
Won't despair
Old and bent
I won't care
I'll have spent
One day
Out there

Phoenix Avatar

 

This is one of the few rare images I have from at SN before the castle in the sky was dismantled. You can't really see the castle, but in the corner to the right on the picture you can see part of it. This is my avatar/character I have on my one account. She's a djinn and her name is Phoenix. As you can see from her appearance she is a fire based type creature. and absolutely adorable ^_^. At least I like to think so.

So True...

That's the truth, and If Someone can't accept you for who you are, you don't need them. Remember to be yourself in all things. By being honest to yourself and those around you, your life will be that much better.

Disney in Sl

There are all kinds of places to explore in Sl. I've come to think that some of the amazing things we want to do in rl, can be done in sl. They certainly don't replace the rl events, but they are still wonderful experiences.

Sometimes it's even fun to play a little bit of dress up. It gives ya something to do while you're in world, and definitely brings joy to not only yourself, but other people you may see in world. It's kinda nice. But it's just a dream. A wonderful digital dream.

Just a little Joke

"I'm lonely, " Adam told God in the Garden of Eden."I need to have someone around for company."

"Okay," replied God. "I'll give you the perfect companion. She is beautiful, intelligent, and gracious_ she'll cook and clean for you and never say a cross word."

"Sounds great," Adam said. "But what's she going to cost?"

"An arm and a leg," answered God.

"That's pretty steep," replied Adam. "What can I get for a rib?"

quoted from "The Joke's on EWE!" by Paul M. Miller

looking for reason

Upon reflecting on the many things I have done and seen in second life I've come to wonder just what my main motivation has been. What is it that I'm looking for? Am I trying to fill some sort of void? Or am I simply trying to entertain myself? I don't know anymore.

If I am trying to fill a void I wish I knew what it was. Because right now, I'm still prey to a great big feeling of emptiness. Sometimes I can forget, and my friends have been wonderful at helping me work my way almost out of the void. But oft times there's nothing to keep me from wondering if I've really been doing anything worthwhile or not.

If I'm trying to entertain myself, why is it that I am only partially successful? Shouldn't I be happy and well entertained if it has been for my amusement? I feel like this cannot be the correct answer either. If it was merely for entertainment there would be some sort of feeling of closure.   There is no closure though, so it can't be that I'm searching for entertainment.

Maybe I'm looking for someplace to belong? I have made some wonderful friends, and even feel comfortable and at home at times. But lately that feeling wavers and drifts. There's not always a safe haven. Not all actions are certain and not all people are honest. There are people that want nothing more than to hurt others. This worries me.

Just what is it that I should be doing? Can I do anything different to find my place? What is my niche now? I don't know. I really don't know.

A little on my alter egos

My alter egos are very different. At least to me they are. The goblin is bossy, prissy, and almost confident. While the dragon is more lovable, caring, and hopeful. Both of them are extensions of myself and allow me opportunities to explore various ideas and situations that I can't deal with in rl.

I'm not entirely sure which one that I enjoy being anymore. They each have their own circles of friends and different experiences that have helped mold them into what they are. Some of those friendships have started to overlap lately. Not that it's a bad thing, it just leads to some interesting interactions as I lapse into a state of betweeness while being either one. Betweeness is probably not a word, but it's the only way that I can explain it in an almost clear manner.

I guess it would make more sense with an explanation about how they each came to be, the reasoning for their existence. The goblin was my first walk into Second Life. She's a character that has become more developed over time, and currently she has an inventory of almost 70,000 pieces. She's worked in clubs doing various functions, and as her I've explored a lot of sims and met many different people.

The dragon is a much younger character. I originally created her as a way to poke around sl without worrying about the responsibilities the goblin had. People didn't know me, and I was ok with that. It was almost a treat to be able to explore without the worries of upsetting anyone. I had no worries, no cares, and no responsibilities. I stopped playing her for a long time, because I was content being the goblin.

Then came my meltdown. A case of the drama llama's invaded my second life. It was highly stressful to me and I didn't know how to react to it. I honestly still don't. Part of me feels worried just typing and thinking about it. But This blog is about figuring out who I am. What I am.

What am I? Am I a dragon? Am I a goblin? Am I both? Can I really keep both persona's up and active? Do I need to make a decision? Should I make a decision? I don't know at this moment what my choices really are. I guess that my choices are rather simple. Be one or be the other, or maybe be none at all. But then I could be both of them. I just don't know right now what to think or do anymore.

Maybe it's almost time for me to move on? Is there a place where avatar's go when their consciousnesses give up? Do they have a place where they go to retire? It might be interesting to see... an avatar retirement home.

Just a song to provoke some thought.

I picked up the morning paper
The headlines were no surprise
A random act of senseless violence
Was committed again last night
It seems the whole world has gone crazy
And something needs to be done
So starting today, I'm gonna find a way
I'm gonna repay someone

With a random act of senseless kindness
Unexpected hand to help remind us
A little bit of love is the cure for hate
It's easy to give up but it's never too late
A single step in the right direction
Person to person making a connection
We can change the world that's become so violent
With a random act of senseless kindness

How I long to live the simple life
When neighbors were still friends
And the sidewalks leading downtown
Were safe to walk back then
The classrooms and the school yards
Were havens for our kids
Well, it's a long way back but we can get on track
Today's a good day to begin

With a random act of senseless kindness
Unexpected hand to help remind us
A little bit of love is the cure for hate
It's easy to give up but it's never too late
A single step in the right direction
Person to person making a connection
We can change the world that's become so violent
With a random act of senseless kindness

With a random act of senseless kindness
Unexpected hand to help remind us
A little bit of love is the cure for hate
It's easy to give up but it's never too late
A single step in the right direction
Person to person making a connection
We can change the world that's become so violent
With a random act of senseless kindness
A random act of senseless kindness

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Sometimes that's all it takes. A little kindness can make a big difference in someones life. With that in mind, maybe you could make that difference. It doesn't take much. We're all in dire need of some humanity these days, don't let a chance to show your own level of depth. Try to reach out, and try to give a helping hand. You never know when you'll need a helping hand yourself.

Music can Say A Lot

And this song says a whole lot to me. Don't ask me exactly why but it does. Give the lyrics a read through. It really is a beautiful song. And I know, there's a song for everything. My friends know me well enough in that sense.

"Stand Still, Look Pretty"

I want to paint my face
And pretend that I am someone else
Sometimes I get so fed up
I don't even want to look at myself

But people have problems that are worse than mine
I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time
And I hate the way you look at me I have to say
I wish I could start over

[Chorus]
I am slowly falling apart
I wish you'd take a walk in my shoes for a start
You might think it's easy being me
You just stand still, look pretty

Sometimes I find myself shaking
In the middle of the night
And then it hits me and I can't
Even believe this is my life

But people have problems that are worse than mine
I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time
And I wish that everyone would go and shut their mouths
I'm not strong enough to deal with it

[Chorus 2x]

Reality Bites

I play two characters online in a game called Second Life. One character I have set up as being my own variation of a goblin. The other character is a dragon. But behind both of them is the same pair of eyes, the same mind, and the same miseries. I play up to being a happy go lucky being, but those closest to me, know that's not always the truth.

The truth is that reality bites. Underneath everything I try to project, the happiness, and the fun, I'm not entirely a happy person. The whole point of me playing Second Life is to escape reality. I get to wear a mask and be something I can only ever dream of being. I can go places and explore versions of the world, that were or may never be. This eases my rl frustration at being stuck where I am.

Escapism, the one thing that I really have left. I know it isn't a healthy thing. I know that it isn't a permanent solution. But for now it does what I need. What worries me most though, is what happens when it doesn't anymore? What is there to do?

Reality is hard to control, and I don't like who I am. I've tried changing, but it doesn't do much good. Second Life gives me some control so I feel like I am in charge of something in my life. I may not make anything out of myself, I may never even really be happy for long. But those few moments, when I can feel it, when true joy fills me. Makes it worth the misery.

I kinda wish that there was something in my real life that worked better than sl. I need something that distracts me, and challenges me, and gives me a creative outlet. Unfortunately most of the arts require some sort of monetary investment and that's not really something that I have available either. But I do have Second Life at my fingertips. I can go into either of my lives and talk to my friends and explore the world.

But is it going to be good for me in the long run? People look at me odd when I say I'm a goblin, or a dragon. But I don't see how it's any different than anything else one might be.But that's the escapist in me. More than anything I want to be anywhere but where I am. But I can't see where I have left to go, let alone how I can get there.

Oh, well... c'est la vie.